So, I found and accepted a different job (part time) during my maternity leave and told my previous employer to kick rocks. And I am settling into my fourth week of work of the new gig. I like it. I'm a marketing/office manager for a much smaller company and it's working out very well.
Speaking of working out... I have not been. After like my first week of work, I went to pick out (i.e., shop for) a few choice items at a couple of my favorite stores and they were four dress sizes larger than what I was last year this time. :-/ Needless to say, I didn't buy everything I wanted... my pride wouldn't let me.
I originally wanted to be 14 pounds lighter by next week, seven weeks ago. This really isn't going to happen. Since this is absolutely not going to happen (I've actually gained some weight since I let the cookie fetish WIN once I got back to work and cooking daily starting to dwindle) I've got to start anew... really getting on my game.
Not only do I need to get on the ball with my certifications, but also I simply must just GET in gear. And I have finally admitted to myself that I need help... accountability. SO, Friday, I got up at my normal time and went to a WW meeting before I went in to work. Yep, I signed up again. This time it was for the monthly pass that includes FREE eTools (that makes me happy, I loved eTools but not enough to pay $12 a month or whatever it was for it). As usual, it's taken me a few days to get into the swing of things.
But today, I finally got my water intake and I took a vitamin after forgetting to do so for two days in a row. I also, after not being able to crawl out of bed this morning because RJ was irritable and wouldn't let me go very far, worked out to my step DVD. Erm, for 17 minutes. *sigh* The DVD was 30 minutes long. I felt flushed and hot and my thighs were stinging in 17 minutes. Finally RJ started whining in his bouncer chair and I used it as an excuse to stop. I probably could have finished, but man, it was a mess.
For the first time in a long time, I felt like a complete novice loser -- NOT that people who just get on the ball are losers. That is totally NOT what I meant but for ME, I am in a slump. Any who, this feeling is something I hadn't felt since I first decided to get back on the ball and take charge of my health/weight in Summer 2003. The first time I remembered I used to be a dual athlete in high school and tip-top shape. The first time (since that one time in college) that I went to a floor aerobics class and was sweating like a faucet. It left me breathing like my lungs were on fire.
I feel it in my body when I walk around the house. Things jiggling cause they have lost their muscle tone and it kind of depresses me. I know I have a beautiful excuse, who lays next to me sleeping as I type... but it's still a little hump to get over. But today, I no longer live in the dark. I accept the fact that while I am still fabulous, there is work to do. No more pretending it's not happening. I have to take control before it gets outta whack. I have to start being accountable for my actions. Weight Watchers helps me do that. They WATCH me. I have however, decided that I am going to get a note from Sandy (my nurse gyno) saying what weight is a healthy for me. While Weight Watchers wants me to be 135, I think that's a bit too small for me. So my LM goal will be 145. As of my weigh in Friday, that's 33.6 pounds AKA the weight I was a mere last summer. It's so amazing how fast it can come back without paying attention.
This blog is my first step at not only being more accountable for myself, but also as a great marketing tool (of some sort) for my fitness business. I will be on the scale once a week. The OFFICIAL scale... watching it decrease and resuming the life I once loved but with an adorable addition -- my family.
