Take (Self) Care

(Editor's Note: I'm coming off two weeks of very little/sporadic rest, strep throat, a missed budget, and lots of work...)

So yesterday I walked past my mirror and caught a glimpse of myself... I was not pleased. Not only did my skin look blah and drab, but my hair looked dry and I looked fat (yet happy -- like literally, I was walking past singing a song very loudly and with a smile on my face, saw myself and my smile faded)... life has been really good as of late, yet my body shows a different story. So, I took a vow (didn't I already DO that??) to do better.

Money can be soooo tight sometimes, I often forget to take care of myself. After that mirror glimpse it dawned on me that in recent months, I stopped getting my regular mani/pedis, I'd went several more weeks than my normal four for retwisting my roots, I hadn't gotten my eyebrow maintenance, I'd put on a few pounds, I wasn't drinking much water, I hadn't washed my truck in Jehovah knows how long.... *sigh*

All very interesting seeing as how, I'm -- well I was -- the girl who wouldn't go so much as to the grocery store without making sure I was on the top of my game... maybe not stilettos and booty jeans for a store run but definitely cognisant of looking good and feeling my best. I haven't done that lately. Today, my sweetheart treated my car to a carwash. He called me and asked me to meet him there where he was getting his car done and grateful to not have it looking a mess, I immediately went. Throwing on an old pair of Adidas to top off my black lounge pants, I wrapped myself in muh black bubble Eddie Bauer and tied up my scarf... and headed out.

I got there and after we'd both finally got in, I went to sit next to him. In walks the chick that used to be me, dressed to impress even if only to go to the car wash. And I started to think.... what the HECK has happened to me?? I can't even blame it on being a mommy, cause as we all should by know, I've always deemed myself MILF status ever since I was good and pregnant.... but I've allowed my weight to literally control my mood. I'm not imaginative with my work wardrobe anymore... just kinda go with the flow. Since I'm on my feet all day, I avoid wearing heels often... I gave lots and lots of my shoes away to charity because I was originally to buy a bus load more... never happened... so, I went to buy some clothes for myself to give myself a boost in the right direction today... nothing huge, just a bit of retail therapy for my mood that matches my skin.

Ladies, have you been there before? In that spot where you just don't feel like yourself? How did you fix the problem? Or was it just an issue for the moment? I mean, really, sometimes I'm so bored and want to go out, but don't feel I look right in ANYTHING I put on. I used to know I was the hottest thing on my King's arm, lately I wonder if I don't get invited to something is it because he thinks I look drab too. lol... I laugh cause I'm serious.

I recently wrote a blog about us (ladies) not losing sight of ourselves in order to do our part to keep The Black Family strong and the excitement in our relationships.

In gist, I'm not feeling my normal overly confident self and I hate it... and I know it's something serious because I'm not even bleeding and I feel this way... for my guy readers, that means it's not the PMS talking. So consider this my two weeks notice. I'm going to start looking how I feel (which is really a whole other story in itself, does that mean when I was looking my very best I was secretly masking being unhappy?? Lawd... so many unanswered questions!) and taking charge of myself in the best of times and the worst of times...

Brings me back to the discussion (can't find the link) about how I am most motivated to lose weight and stay in shape when I am single and looking... ridiculous. I'm not announcing it to the world or anything, but I've got to get it together... I'm on it. No, seriously. It's time to be a little bit selfish.... cause how can I be the best mom and woman if I don't take care of myself first? I'm pretty dope at both now, so just imagine if I looked and felt I looked my best. I'm just adding some perspective... for myself.

Sometimes it's useful to be a little selfish and introspective otherwise you may just find yourself living someone else's life, achieving someone else's dreams or driving down a road with no destination or end game. ~ The Ripple Effect (Blog)

Photo Sources: http://www.wellspouse.org
http://rainbow120.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/self-esteem-training.jpg

(Oh ee oh, dancin in) September Epiphany

Well hello there! I'm still here... feelin fat and what not.

I've been on a celebratory binge to enjoy getting a job offer on Friday. In RETROSPECT, I did it a lot more controlled than I normally would. So for that, I am proud of myself. But I'm really trying to get back to business as usual.

Tomorrow, I'm gonna try out a run. On my knee. Pray for me.

This will be a very busy week for me planning meals, getting together a schedule I'm comfortable with, researching a YMCA near my (new) job for lunchtime workouts, getting a cooler for my car to house my food and snacks for the day, researching day cares and the like... it's cool cause for the first time in a long time, I find myself pulling out a gym bag from the storage area for lunchtime workouts... This is going to work, pun intended.

With September upon me... I must focus. I think getting a schedule about my day will help immensely. Now if only my (new) supervisor would call me about the lunch date we're supposed to have to discuss particulars. I'm too excited about this opportunity for it to fall through now... soooo... come on. I'll call him in the morning to see if we're still on.

In the meantime, I have two other day cares to check out tomorrow. Hopefully, will be able to make my choice by Friday.

I'm really, really excited about all that's going on... and I feel really good about the progress I'll make. Before when I wasn't working, working out was my sanctuary and then it was taken from me with the knee stuff... but now it will be an addition to my actual LIFE. Hopefully... oyee... call me back! haha

30 x 30 Challenge
So today is the first of my favorite month ~ September. I adore fall... and it is the welcome to it. I am determined to center my chi and focus to drop (not lose, because when you lose things you ultimately find them) 30 pounds to my goal weight. Exactly 19 weeks to my 30th birthday. And I have a plan in mind... I wish I could stay in reflective mode ALL DAY because that is when I am my best. I really miss my runs, so I AM going to get up in the morning and give one a good old try.. and pray like hell it doesn't hurt or irk.

SO.. I'm gonna keep it to 1200-1350 calories.. I'm going to see about getting through the months of September with no red meat or pork and no more than 4 oz of meat a day. Lots of fruit and veggies.

A (hopeful) C25K run 3 times a week.

Strength training through Chalene Extreme... MUST get through this 3-month program.

When all is said and done... my goals will come into existence but I definitely need to:

1. Stop getting down on myself when I do slip.
2. Turn every negative into a positive until the negatives disappear.
3. BELIEVE in myself.
4. Learn how to control my impulses and celebrations.

Through a steady routine of running and strength training... I must emerge.

I'm tired ya'll... tired of not living to my potential. Tired of not being the size I'm supposed to be... the health I deserve... the energy I need... but I can't continue to talk about it. In fact... I'm tired of that too. It's time for action. And I know I have had epiphany's before... or thought I did... but I'm seriously done... talking.

Time for some action.

This September of 2009 is the beginning of my new life, a healthier life with my sun, my love and working hard for the things I want to keep me grounded.

Time for some action.

UPDATE BLOG: Are you hurt? Or are you injured?

Hey! I'm still here! :)

"Are you hurt, or are you injured?"
"What's the difference, coach?"
"If you're hurt you can play, if you're injured..."
~ "Coach Winters" in The Program

Well after a few frustrating days of not being able to see my doctor or schedule an appointment, I decided to show up today on a morning I knew she was scheduled to be in a different office to walk-in and see a new primary care physician. He saw me and my knee and even though the "treatment" of it is spanned out over four weeks, I'm happy that the ball is even rolling. Because it definitely wasn't getting better with R.I.C.E.ing.

So he prescribed me some stronger ibuprofen than what I have in the cabinet and scheduled me for an MRI for the first appt I could get (8/25) saying that hopefully the ibuprofen will start to help the swelling before then. There's like a little bubble of ... something... sitting inside the left side of my left kneecap. And then I follow up with him on 9/8 (the soonest we could meet b/c he's goin on vacay for two weeks and since I just kinda deciced to switch to him as my primary care... he was originally gonna have me see my old physician and I declined. Who knows, maybe a lil ibuprofen inflammatory twice a day (I would never think to take that much ibuprofen in a day) might actually help a ton and by the time I see him he'll have even better news for me.) In the meantime, I'll wait. It severely throws off my timetable, but I'm just gonna start getting in about 30 minutes of the elliptical three times a week... not too long, but enough to get something done. And possibly some swimming. (I don't like the upkeep of swimming with all the showering in the gym and swim caps and carrying on lol) and staying as flexible as possible in hopes to keep up my endurance so that when this is all said and done, I can pick up where I left off, repeating week 4 and moving on with my life. Hopefully that won't throw off my training for my 5K too much. It's still 11/1 so hopefully all will be well. I have high hopes.

As of this morning I'm doing best to follow the Fat Smash Detox as of this a.m. I have never been very successful doing this... why, I'm not sure especially when I have managed to Master Cleanse for several days in succession. So this time, especially since now my activity has severely decreased, I need to make sure I follow the eating "rules" to continue to be able to positively contribute to the challenge I'm in on Spark People. So far today, I've had a small something every couple hours. Banana for breakfast, strawberry protein smoothie (with a cup of real strawberries in addition to the strawberry mix) and then two veggie kebabs with zucchini, squash and yellow pepper. Very tasty. I am soaking my red beans to make vegetarian red beans and gonna make a big pot of brown rice for the "heavy" stuff. But keeping it predominantly veggies and fruits and actually gonna really stick to the guidelines of how you're to prepare them: steamed, raw or grilled. Wish me luck.

30 X 30 Challenge
Thanks to Allyn, a Spark buddy, I was motivated to SHED 30 pounds by our 30th bday. She's a Capricorn as well and our 30th bdays are in days of each other. It's ironic because I'd thought to strive for that before, but the impatient girl in me, really wanted to get it done MUCH sooner than that. But that is also how I have done in the past. I put a LOT of pressure on myself to meet these dates when, sensibly, it would be better to give myself more time, even if I don't need it. It's just the fair thing to do. I owe myself that. My birthday present to myself will be MAINTENANCE. lol

Well, actually, I am looking into a February Ski/Super Bowl trip to the Catskills as my belated present. But my real present is maintenance. :)

Good-bye "Good" Parts!
Even in all this madness, I have still managed to lose a nice amount of weight (even tho the doc's scale was like 4 lbs heavier than what my home scale says I am... oyeee... need a new scale, man) and I want to keep these results.

I really, truly... truly miss C25K. I had no idea I could enjoy running so much. It's very empowering. And I hope I can get back to it a lot sooner than later.

A little while ago, I wrote a blog about losing the "good parts" . I am proud to announce that those good parts are slimming on down. My tight skinny jeans... not so tight anymore. I am seeing the results of my work and it makes me feel so great.

I caught a glance at myself in the full-body mirror and while I AM trimming down the "good parts" I'm also toning them up and lifting thangs splendidly... and guess what? The man notice anyhow.

As I told BUTTA... the men are taking notice not only because our BODIES are changing but WE are changing. Our self-esteem grows with every workout we finish, every inch we lose and every muscle we gain. Yay for us.

In the meantime...
I finally bought my poster board. I am about to use my "down" time as a breather to get my collage done... I am excited about the project and can't wait to post pics.

Keep moving...

Weekly Reflection... Percentages... Injured Randomness...

So with weigh-in upon me... this day has been an energetic ride uphill... hard. I've been reflecting since I woke up from my late nap (6 p.m.) My food tracking has been kinda shady and sporadic the last couple days. And I got on the scale and saw a number I didn't appreciate despite seeing a number I appreciated yesterday. Now, because I know it's not always good to weigh yourself everyday, and ESPECIALLY not different times everyday, I wasn't trippin too much on the numbers/difference but it DID make me wonder about how truly committed to this I am. With a sore knee pickin at me since Tuesday, I've wondered about everything about it from it being a simple sprain that will fade with time to an injury that will be with me for the rest of my life. I immediately (in my world) was angry with myself because well, our knees suffer from the pressure of our body weight more than any other joint. And here I am 30 lbs heavier than I should be. Of course my poor knee is gonna whine. *sigh* Then I thought about my poor tracking.. knowing how important it is to journal food... how could I let this fall by the wayside? I want to be in MAINTENANCE MODE by the winter... how in the heck can I get there if I am not committed EVERYDAY?

So I started thinking, what percentage am I giving?

Anyone can log a thousand fitness minutes a week but if that person is still eating trash... the results will be less than stellar.

Likewise, if one is eating clean without any activity, you'll see the difference but muscle tone and strength and overall health are lessened...

These two are interchangeable... and once I really realize that, perhaps that is when I will really start to morph and see that. I have to learn to balance life, love and all that's in between for myself... to get to 100% committed. Nothing less than that will do. With that said, I've decided to start sharing my food trackers. Not that anyone will really read them, but knowing that someone might... perhaps that'll keep me accountable.

Blah... It seems I'm in a mood.

Blame the "injury"... reflections eternal.

"Independence"

"Girl I didn't know you could get down like that"
~ "Independent Ladies" Destiny's Child

So as I rub on my flat(ter) full stomach sitting on my couch watching old school cartoons on Boomerang... I must admit, I feel great. I just had my breakfast (egg white omelette with fresh spinach, minced garlic and topped with soy cheese, 1/2-cup brown rice and a cup of sliced strawberries), I'm sippin on my liter of water, and just feeling... great. On this Independence Day, I am inspired -- with all it's great meaning -- to celebrate my own independence from the lifestyle that once had me so shackled I thought it was normal. I stare at the picture of me that I found from 1996... looking back at me was this fit, happy teenager with a body to d-i-e for. She loved to workout, her shoulders were fabulous and her gluteus maximus was propped up like it was holstered by buff boys... oooh wee! lol I was prolly a good 125 lbs on that picture and a size 7/8. (I told ya'll I've always been a muscular, stocky lil something... that weight on my height is usually like a size 4... but anywho..)

I will never have that exact body again, besides having five more body arts, more stretch marks and cellulite, my body has morphed some by gaining different muscles in places I didn't have them before (I didn't do a lot of strength exercise then, just cardio with all the basketball and track and field practice). SO when I emerge a new 13-year older butterfly my body will be different, but maybe -- just maybe -- even better. I'll have filled out some and be muscular vs just thin.

Last night I went out with my sisters to a comedy show and didn't drink. I'd mentioned to my homegirl that I was not going to drink until I hit goal. I realize this is a difficult task to accomplish, so I modified it a bit to drink in moderation. Afterall, if I am ever going to prove I can maintain my weight, I will need to show myself that I can act right when tempted.. drinks, fatty foods, I will need to be able to control myself in these situations. So it made me feel truly ecstatic that I was out with my girls with everything feeling like normal but for this evening I decided NOT to partake. They all were looking at me a lil sideways because it's unnatural for me not to imbibe, lol, but they will have to get used to the new healthier choices me. Sometimes she will drink and IF she does, it will be an alcohol with a low-to-no calorie mixer (i.e., seltzer) or a glass of wine ... something I can account for. So, I will moderate my alcoholic consumption when I choose to drink, which won't be often, but I will not drink any juice or pops. I will stick to crystal light and water. If I choose to have whiskey (which I do often) I will drink it straight... no Coke and only in moderation. This is more feasible than trying to set myself up to fail. Yanno?

Anywho, I am feeling absolutely great today and I just wanted to share with you... what are you independent from today?

Slender, Sexier, SO-healthy Sanni 2009 and Beyond

"To feel 'fit as a fiddle', you must tone down your middle."

~ Unknown

So after finally a month of being more consistent on Spark People for good.. I can say I am finally in a groove. And thought it was time to detail my goals so I know specifically what it is I am going to accomplish over the next 6.5 months (till my 30th birthday).

A little background...

I was a dual athlete all four years of high school and for my freshman year of undergrad. While working full time and in school for my master's at 24, I started reclaiming my athletic body by going to workout faithfully, everyday on my lunch break for an hour. In doing so I trimmed off near 50 pounds I'd packed on during my stagnant years. I also went on to get certified in group fitness.

I moved back home to Chicago for a job opp in 2006, fell in love, got with my partner, got comfortable, gained weight, had a baby in 2007, let my certs lapse and here I am. lol While, I haven't gained all my previous weight back, I am certainly not my previous weight and I aim to get back to that and better.

I love my body/frame because I wear my weight extremely well. People rarely know that I weigh as much as I do, unless I tell them. I know I have a lot of hidden stallion-like muscles under this thickness. I will bring em out, and KEEP em out, before 2009 comes to a close to enter my 30s with no extra weight upon my heart and soul.

There are a total of 28 weeks and 5 days to the day of my born day and exactly 29 weeks to my anticipated weekend celebration. My goal is to be met and maintained by my bday tho. If I consistently lose a simple pound or two a week, I'll be at my goal weight. Sounds simple enough right? lol It's gonna take mad determination, calculated movements and strict by-the book seriousness. I am ready. I haven't felt this ready since 2004 when I got tired climbin up to my 3rd floor apartment and knew a change needed to come and quick. Luckily, I am not as in bad of shape as I was then... so failure this time is not an option.

Goal weight: 138-140... I would like to be 140 pounds or lower. Until further notice. I was 125-130 in high school, so I think 140 is a good, realistic weight to shoot for (in 2006 before I started gaining I was 10 pounds heavier). After accessing my physical appearance and how I feel, IF I want to get back to my high school weight when I get there, I'll work on skimming away those last 10. But we'll see. I wanna keep my assets if you kno what I mean. I was also a B cup in high school and nobody wants that. lol And by nobody, I mean me.

The Program:
Eat five to six small meals a day, drink more than eight glasses of water and workout 5 days a week.

• 8+ glasses of water a day
• 5+ servings of veggies/fruits a day
• 5 days of at least 45 minutes of cardio
• 3 days of strength training
• Track caloric intake and don't go over it; try best to get all the nutrients I need
• Have a healthy breakfast of SOME sort, every morning
• Award myself to the goals
• Surround myself with positive people who know my struggle and support me

Basic Goals

1. Weigh less than 140 pounds
2. Get body fat to 20-22%
3. Get Fitness Certifications
4. Start personal training and fitness instruction business

My 2009 G&R (goals and rewards):

Goal: Weight 165 *~*Achieved: ???
Reward: Get thigh tattoo sleeve expanded..

Goal: Weight 150 *~*Achieved: ???
Reward: Mini shopping spree

Goal: Weight 140 *~*Achieved: ???
Reward: A trip to an exotic place I've never been

Goal: Body fat 25% *~* Achieved: ???
Reward: New workout gear (bras, shoes, shorts, yoga pants etc.)

Goal: Size 10 Pants *~* Achieved: ???
Reward: ACE Certification

Goal: First 5K Competitive Race *~* Completed: ???
Reward: Small weekend getaway

Please check out my fitness/health blog where I talk about my struggles, share articles and eventually client consultations:
http://glamourousglutesgamsandguns.blosp
ot.com

"Lack of activity destroys the good condition of every human being, while movement and methodical physical exercise save it and preserve it."
~ Plato

"Lack of activity destroys the good condition of every human being, while movement and methodical physical exercise save it and preserve it."

~ Plato

Analyze. Strategize: The Intro.

I found my fit girl "crush"... a 35-year-old single mother of two in St. Louis who lost like 50 lbs., got certified as an ACE personal trainer, is now a fitness writer and currently training to be a fitness model. At 35, she changed the game and took on a new job totally unrelated to her two degrees. In the midst of all the adversity she faces, she ventured out.. it inspires me and makes me ashamed. Ashamed that I am SUCH a procrastinator. When the eff did I get sooo stagnant? So lazy? SO careless. I was in my iPhoto just staring at pics of how this...*pinches self* came to be. And then I sat my period-laden butt up all week eating everything under the sun... real rude like. It's like I know what I want and continue to ruin and/or delay my destiny
...

WHY?!

So now I'm reflecting.

The other day I was lookin at myself in the mirror impressed with progress. I swore I saw a shrinking waistline... and then I sabotaged myself. I must, must, must do better. I am currently developing a new strategy in my plan of attack.

10 More Tips for Your Wellness Journey

Easy Ways to Get Healthy

-- By Carrie Myers Smith, Health & Fitness Writer

Looking for more ways to become a healthier you? Here are 10 great ideas you can use any day, every day.

1. Drink a glass of water. Water is an essential nutrient for life. But beyond that, you just plain feel better when you’re well-hydrated. More energy, brighter eyes, healthy skin and a decreased chance of headaches are just a few of the benefits you’ll glean from drinking up!

2. Go for a walk. There’s nothing like a nice, brisk walk to relieve stress, give you a boost of energy and get the brain cells working again!

3. Call a friend. Do you have a friend who you know is going through some tough times? Why not zip off a quick note or give her a call and offer encouragement to her. She won’t be the only one who feels better!

4. Journal. Keeping a diary or journal has been shown to be a stress reliever. Seeing a quandary on paper can also help you uncover concrete solutions to it. Take a moment to write down a problem you’ve been encountering and get ready to resolve it!

5. Soak your feet. Your feet literally carry you throughout your day. Do something kind for them. Kick your shoes off and give them a good rub down. If you can, take a few minutes to soak them. Cover the bottom of a basin with marbles, fill the basin with warm water and sprinkle in some Epsom salts and a few drops of your favorite essential oil. While soaking, glide your feet over the marbles for a mini-massage. After you’ve soaked your feet, slather on a rich re-hydrating cream.

6. Send a thank you note. Has someone done something nice for you and you have yet to really thank her? No time like the present! Send a nice thank you note now!

7. Eat a snack. If you find your energy waning between meals, eat a small, healthy snack to boost your brain back into action. Combining a whole grain, fruit, or vegetable with a protein: nuts, nut butters, low-fat dairy products, seeds, soy products, lean meats, fish, or poultry will give you a sustained energy boost to get you to your next meal.

8. Chew a stick of sugar-free gum. There’s nothing like a clean, fresh mouth to make you feel refreshed all over. But when you can’t get to your toothbrush and floss, chew on a piece of sugar-free gum instead to give your mouth and body an invigorating zing.

9. Organize your space. Whether it’s at the office or at home, clutter can make you feel sick – literally. Get rid of what you don’t need and organize what’s left. Take a few minutes right now to clean up your space.

10. Take "five." Allowing your body to run on a constant adrenaline rush, which happens when you’re in continual stressed-out mode, wreaks havoc on the body. Take several breaks throughout your day to simply breathe, pray, or whatever it takes to bring your body down to neutral.

Source

My Dangerous Kitchen

After a little prodding from Spark People, I decided to inspect my kitchen. I needed to clean out my fridge anyway because I had to figure out a comfortable temperature setting because it was freezing things. So I took this as a time to really examine what I had going on in my fridge, my cupboards and beyond. 

And they were right, I did have a lot of hidden pitfalls in there. Sour creams, sugar-based juices etc. And then there were not so bad food, but I still bagged them up. Like non whole wheat pasta and cereals and my white rice (gasp!). Yep. I did it. I finally, finally figured out a way to make brown rice that I am comfortable with and it doesn't taste God awful to me.  

"To have healthy habits and a healthier lifestyle, you first must live in a healthy environment.

This is so true. I had already jump started this by making my workout closet. An organized place where I keep all my workout/fitness equipment so that it is always accessible and right there when I need it. I needed to take the same approach with my kitchen where the "fuel" is. Because I can be gung-ho about getting in shape, eating healthy... but unless I arm myself properly, I am sure to fail. I avoided eating late last night... my will power was strong but everyday isn't that easy.  

So I took stock to see what was going on in there.

Starting with the fridge, I threw away sour cream, all the spoiled fruit and veggies (obviously... shoulda been eating that!). I threw out the the ranch. Kept all my oil-based dressings though.

Start with the fridge and pantry. Focus on replacing sugary and high-calorie foods with whole grains and lower-calorie alternatives.

Spark People suggests:

• Learn to read food labels
  
• Buy a sturdy cutting board for all the fresh veggies you’ll be cutting up
  
• Get plenty of plastic bags and containers for portioning out prepared foods and storing healthy leftovers
  
• Collect healthy, quick recipes
  
• Toss out all those pizza coupons
  
• Get a few drinking bottles for keeping cold water in the fridge
  
• Put a bowl of fruit and granola/breakfast bars by the back door
  

The one's in red, I'm working on... 

And while we are still in the kitchen...

... learn where to spend your weight loss dollars. If you want to lose weight and keep it off, it takes more than reading a book or joining a gym. It really takes a lifestyle change of consistently picking up good habits and chucking old habits to the curb. Exchanging habits takes some time, so the smartest thing you can do is to make it easy on yourself. That means making it easy on your pocketbook too.

Here's a quick glance of what's in my kitchen.... and a couple recipes I adore... you're welcome lol

• quality knife
  
• vegetable peeler
  
• measuring cups
  
• scale
  
• calorie handbook
  
• portable containers
  
• snack size baggies
  

Here's how I reorganized my fridge: (pics to come)

• threw out fatty unhealthy choices
• washed and placed veggies at eye level
• made it convenient to eat healthy

Here are my healthy alternatives I brought in:

• butter spray, squeeze and Can't Believe It's Not Butter vs. actual butter or marjarine
  
• string cheese & individual cheese snack blocks
  
• egg whites - quick source of protein (I bowled and froze the egg whites from actual eggs... cheaper than buying them already separated.
  
• tuna packets (easy to just top on a bed of greens, no draining fuss)
  
• oil based salad dressing sprays (1 calorie per spray) 
  
• tofurkey slices (found some really good vegetarian lunch meat)
  
• fat-free yogurt, strawberries, apples
  
• low-fat cottage cheese (still not a big fan of this stuff but much like the brown rice movement, hoping for a revelation!)
  
• whole-grain/wheat pastas and starches 

How I organized my cupboards... What's in it? 

• high fiber/low carb whole-wheat bread
  
• cereal (high fiber/low cal)
  
• oatmeal packets
  
• put all snacks in separate snack bins (raw almonds, calorie snack packs, teas, etc)
• whole wheat pasta
  
• pre-packaged ingredients (dried cranberries, crushed almonds etc)
  
• sugar free chocolate pudding
  
• sugar free Jell-O
  
• Cool Whip
  
• whey protein powder mix
  

Waldorf Salad Spin-Off

1-cup green apples

1/2 cup dried cranberries

1/2 cup crushed almonds

1-cup fat free yogurt

1 dash lemon juice

Sweet Treat

Sugar-free chocolate pudding

Sugar-free strawberry jello

1 Tbsp Cool Whip

1/2 cup fresh strawberries

Don't Wait for Life-Changing Events

I always feel really silly when I (re)start a workout. Because I feel SO.GOOD when I am done. It's weird that I stopped in the first place. So today was official day one. My schedule is different than when I started the program. Now, I workout Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday doing the Chalene Extreme. Tomorrow is a rest day, but I am currently mapping out a safe route to bike in the a.m.

And now, after a healthy breakfast of Cinnamon Pecan cereal smothered in skim milk lol, I am snackin on frozen sliced strawberries. It wasn't planned for them to be frozen, but my fridge is a beast. But I actually kinda like them like this... kinda feels like a frozen treat. Might be on to something!

I did my workout at 8:30.. later than I planned to and my sun was up which made it more difficult cause he would try to crawl between my legs during my squats to be cute and problematic lol BUT I made it through it and I felt great... I'm also finally, finally using my SPARK PAGE and I'm not going to leave it unused again. It's also an app on my iPod Touch, so now there's absolutely NO EXCUSE for me not to track my stuff, get on it. What's ironic? I created my Spark Page almost a month to the day that I created this blog. Sense a pattern? So here we go... also there are several friends I actually know who are members also, so there's that accountability again. I must get it together ya'll... for me.

You know what I was thinking about yesterday? How complacent we women get in relationships. We fall into these new people who we're loving in this new euphoric state, but what I vow to do NOW, from this day forward (well I had already vowed, but now get to put it to the test) is to continue to keep/get myself together. Just because we're seeing someone doesn't mean we should stop our goals, dreams and plans. If anything, that person should make you strive harder, they should motivate you...

I did a little background on myself and everytime I've gotten fit, accomplished something it was after I'd left a significant relationship. Even when I got fit in 2005, it was after a breakup the previous fall. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. In general, it's human nature to have epiphany's after major life changes/decisions... but I'm not gonna wait for something life-changing to happen before I do something to counter...


I am going to MAKE LIFE HAPPEN.

Dinner tonight...

Marinated broiled chicken breasts (low-sodium soy sauce, garlic powder and onion power) basted while broiling.

Sauteed asparagus in olive oil with red/white onion, celery, garlic and red pepper... pan sprayed with Pam olive oil

Brown rice

One Easter Sunday...

So, I had company in over the weekend and didn't drift far away from the plan. (That's the plus.) The negative is, I missed my Sunday morning workout but positively because I went to a place of worship in honor of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. So, I woke up this morning and did my Sunday workout and WILL do my Monday workout later today to make up for missing. I said I was going to get all workouts in this week and I meant it. Since I couldn't get cheap heavier weights so soon, I had a lightbulb moment: I used my wrist/ankle weights. I have four 2.5# weights and two 5# straps so I incorporated those this morning to lift 10# and 13# respectively and didn't curse but only on one exercise... fyi, the Bowler's Lunge wid Single Arm Row is the devil!

I've added a couple photos of my new "workout closet." I converted the closet in my study to a little classy storage area of my workout materials and I think it's awesomely great. I find it the best way to keep everything I need in one place so that I don't ever misplace any workout equipment from my body fat monitor to my stopwatch and, most recently, even my scale. Which I am buying new batteries for today. Usually I just weigh in on the Wii, but I find that the scale is a little more accurate... heh, irony.

You will learn I hate the scale. Because of this I will only weigh myself when I measure, which is instructed to do after every 30 days (of which the first 30 officially began today).

I will also be adding photos of the healthy recipes I make so you can see and know what I am eating. Contrary to a very popular belief we cannot just eat whatever we want and workout hard and expect to see the drastic changes in our body that we seek. Which is why under every before and after picture on those commercials you see "results not typical. One thing those people have is usually a personal trainer that sits with them through every workout to make sure they don't cheat on the workouts, are eating what they're supposed to as prescribed by usually a nutritionist who has figured out the exact amount of calories they need or a prepared food service that sends you the exact meals you're to eat for the week. Lucky devils!

Many of us are not as fortunate or just don't have the deep pockets for that kind of luxury so we have to be our own personal trainer and make sure we don't cheat ourselves and fill our bodies with fuel food that feeds and helps us from the inside out. I think of that phrase: I don't live to eat, I eat to live! And the truth of the matter is, what we choose to intake today can affect our health tomorrow. So we have to be cognisant of what goes in. What are the goals I am trying to accomplish by eating / drinking this? Will it help me toward my main goal. I admit, I was not always following this. But it felt SO good this weekend to know I could make better decisions about my food (didn't eat fast food ONCE... I cooked and ate home cooked meals) I had just a few drinks and no had liquor (only wine and ONE beer). It is those baby steps that are going to cement my hard work... and eventually I will have no alcoholic beverage but every blue moon vs. "on the weekends" and then I'll really be something.
I plan to arise out of this a lean, mean, toned machine. Jah willing, I will not fail and I will not be back in this predicament ever again. Nothing outside of something out of my control will return me to my overweight status. And that's what we all have to say.

We control this!

We are in charge of our weight. WE are in charge or our body.

LET'S GET HEALTHIER... for our children, for our families, for our mind, body, soul... for you.

Workout 2 (and 3) on deck. Burn Intervals and Ab Burner later today... (approximately another 40 minutes of activity). Don't forget to eat well, be well, and take your multivitamin! :)

My schedule. My plan. My life.

I have been weighed in twice since my official return to Weight Watchers and I am down 3 pounds! The first weigh in, I gained nothing/lost nothing. This was more than perfect for me because I usually take a week or two to really get in the swing of things when committing to Weight Watchers. So today when I went in, I was ready. I had tracked about 40% of my meals, got in more than my daily water everyday and was active 3 days out of the week. I knew the scale would move downward, the question be how far down? The answer was an even 3 and I was ecstatic. Now this week (week three) is usually the week where I really start to get into my groove. I've got a whole new outlook on how to excel at this beautiful way of life... persistent, hard work. I can't get by with the half-assed way I used to do things. I must reach far beyond my goals.

My two main goals I really want to attain with recommitting myself to WW this time around (besides life membership) is to continuously see progression:

1. Don't miss a week -- at all.
(I looked at my old weight tracker books and saw how sometimes I wouldn't go for a week or two at a time. This is not the way to become a life member. Not at all.)
2. Do everything in my power to FOLLOW THE PROGRAM and avoid gains. In other words: LOSE LOSE LOSE.
(A plateau, while still not as sexy as losing is better than gaining. I am determined to lose SOMETHING every week. No gains. Full speed ahead, dammit.)

I have my pamphlet to be a team leader on my fridge along with an old picture of me in high school. Granted, I don't want to be as thin as I was in high school, my goal weight is actually 10-15 pounds more than that, but it gives me the "after" picture I am looking for.

The way I operate, the way I need to start to be successful at damn near everything I do needs, needs, needs to start with a plan. A schedule, if you will, for success. From my daily routine with life to the maintenance of my hair, I now understand I need a daily blueprint to follow. For life to be so short, it sure is busy. There aren't enough hours in a day, so one should spend her time making the better of every one of them.

From my religious studying, to family time & home life, to work, to fitness and my healthier lifestyle, to my hair, everything needs it's own little commitment in my days and weeks for it all to emerge victorious. My goal for the rest of September is to get my schedule -- for each of the important things that comprise what is my life -- in order for continued, visual success in the future months to come.

It would be nice to at least be at my 10% target before year's end: exactly 14 pounds for 14 more weeks/weigh-ins. (The goal would actually be to be MORE than my 10% but since I am nursing, a pound a week, every week for the rest of this year would put me at my 10% at a healthy pace without sabotaging my milk production, but you know what I mean!)